well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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