Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
