i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize