Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Randomize
