what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize