they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
