i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I forgot how hot balto sounded
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
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