isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
