i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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