i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
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