Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
