I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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