Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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