Whod you bang
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
