Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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