You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
