Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
