Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize