my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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