So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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