Hey man sorry I got all grabby
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
