Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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