do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
