You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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