Yo dont text me then not text me
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Randomize
