I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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