He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
