I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
These tits shall not be calmed
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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