would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
