Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I had to cum in my sink.
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