Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
