If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
