I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
