Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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