Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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