I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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