can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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