You're a womanizer and a bitch.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
