Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
