She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
