She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize