No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
