how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize