Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
