I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
