D3 body, D1 cock
Please, let me fuck your mom
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
