I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
