Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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