My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
