I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
