Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
